I am doing something I've never done today...I am doing a portrait session. Of a real live pregnant woman. I was asked a while ago but have put it off. I am nervous. Really nervous. Like, throw up in my mouth nervous. I don't like taking portraits of anyone over the age of 2. There is something about seeing eyes looking directly back at me through my lens. I feel vulnerable. Or maybe I sense the other person feels vulnerable. We're both vulnerable. Both feeling insecure about the side we're on.
I'm wondering if she'll like what I capture. She's wondering if she'll like what she sees. So uncomfortable...hopefully because this is the first time. Or maybe because I set too many expectations.
My prayer is that I make her feel comfortable. But in order to do so, I have to be comfortable. As of right now, I am not comfortable. When she asked me and I agreed, I prefaced it saying this would be for fun and for practice. Right now, I am trying to practice being comfortable.
I've been praying for many things, but specifically the light. It is so easy to blame a bad picture on the external light. Like the picture above. It is overexposed. Too much light. But even if the external light is perfect today, it will be obvious if no internal light is present. I can't make them feel comfortable if I am not comfortable. Perhaps that is where I really need to focus...
I'm wondering if she'll like what I capture. She's wondering if she'll like what she sees. So uncomfortable...hopefully because this is the first time. Or maybe because I set too many expectations.
My prayer is that I make her feel comfortable. But in order to do so, I have to be comfortable. As of right now, I am not comfortable. When she asked me and I agreed, I prefaced it saying this would be for fun and for practice. Right now, I am trying to practice being comfortable.
I've been praying for many things, but specifically the light. It is so easy to blame a bad picture on the external light. Like the picture above. It is overexposed. Too much light. But even if the external light is perfect today, it will be obvious if no internal light is present. I can't make them feel comfortable if I am not comfortable. Perhaps that is where I really need to focus...
"The precepts of the LORD are right, giving joy to the heart. The commands of the LORD are radiant, giving light to the eyes" Psalm 19:8
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